There is so much I want to tell you right now even as I watch you sleeping soundly (the only time I can write is when you drift off to dreamland). But that’s how you are designed right now; you simply cannot comprehend the human language. So here it is, I am writing down my thoughts for you to read one day, after you’re a grown boy.
Giving birth to you has been a beautiful experience, one that cannot be described in words. It’s not just the birth, watching you grow from a baby to a bigger baby has been breathtaking. But you should know that it has been pretty challenging at times, and I have had to take it one day at a time. There have been a dozen times when I’d wished you could talk. But all you ever do is cry when you’re uncomfortable. (I desperately wish you could at least tell me the simple truth if you’re feeling cold or hot, so that I don’t end up over bundling you or freezing you.) Decoding your cries has been my number one task. Even after 9 months, I sometimes have trouble figuring out your problems. One day, I’ll get there.
Everybody told me that being a mother is hard work which involves a number of sacrifices. I have had to give up quite a few things – for instance, I don’t remember the last time I slept through the night or I watched a whole movie without interruptions or had a romantic dinner with your dad or an uninterrupted conversation with your dad or a phone call without baby cries in the background or the last time I looked at myself in the mirror for a whole two minutes or the last time I actually sat down to write for 30 minutes or read my favourite book or hear to my favourite music album or just had a quiet evening to myself. I quit my job to stay beside you, probably the second best decision I took (First one being getting married to your dad: P). Anyway, the list can go on. Initially, I fretted about missing my life but just like how other moms are, I quickly caught up with reality and made you my number one priority.
To name it with the word ‘sacrifice’ would be a shame. The things that I gave up were because it was I who decided to have you as I wanted a miniature version of your parents. I wanted to feel your tiny frame across mine. I wanted to see how life is with a baby. Mind you, it’s rather an adventure. God knows your dad and I have spent a number of nights driving the car around or making funny faces or stifling our yawns to make you laugh or figuring out your problem when you decide to cry mindlessly because you are just doing your baby job.
Though it’s quite hard at times, I know you’re gonna grow up soon into a big boy and I won’t even realise it. One day, I’ll be surprised to see you grow big. Because that’s what people say, time flies and children grow.
You have entered into the ‘separation anxiety’ phase recently in which you simply won’t let go off me when other people pick you up. Of course, you have managed to offend other people but guess what, you are a baby and you’re allowed to make demands. The fact that you openly declare your love for me makes mommy-hood all the more beautiful. While I know that one day you’re gonna be on your own, I can’t deny the fact that right now, the fierce obsession that you have over me is quite flattering. I can’t help smiling on your grandma’s words, “it’s annoying that he won’t come to me. Still, I am glad that someone is crazy for my daughter”.
You have made my year beautiful and life altering. I have to tell you that your father looks best when you are in his arms which only swells my heart with teary emotions. Though, sometimes he simply can’t figure out how to remove your t-shirt which gets on my nerves. (He is under training currently. Let’s see if he gets lucky).
I know my parents had three babies and my in-laws had two babies and I know a number of people who have had babies. While it’s a common life event to have a baby, I can’t ignore the truth that with a baby comes a whole new set of adventured moments. No matter how common is the birth of a baby, the homecoming of a baby into a family is extraordinary in every way.
It’s the New Year’s Eve today. My year has been extremely beautiful and momentous with your grand entrance. I hope yours has been the same too.
Happy New Year, Son. Hope we have more fun filled years to come.
About the Author : Chital Mehta loves to explore new books. After becoming a mother, she started this blog to share her experiences as a mother. Apart from being busy with her baby, she makes times for writing, reading and watching movies. She has authored 4 fiction novels. You can find details on her facebook page :Chital Mehta facebook
Write to her : firstname.lastname@example.org