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A Twin Mom's Perspective on Parenting

 This week, a good friend Megha Vishwanathan from Massachusetts has contributed this article to tell us about her life with twins! I hope you like it as much as I did.


As a twin mom to extremely naughty and giggly 20-month-old girls, I often get asked how do I do it?  So, here's to all who always wonder how I get through my day. Honestly, I don't know. I don't even know if I do it or if it just happens. 

Life with twins is challenging. It's not for the faint hearted. As a first-time mom, I'm often looked at with awe for being extremely laid-back and a calm parent. The truth is, I truly believe those of us with twins have an extra gene that allows us to adapt to the dirt, bugs, tree climbing, and acrobatics times two. We have adapted to feeding two at once, to soothing two at once and we have learned not to sweat the small stuff.

If I worried too much about the dirt my twins ate, I’d be in a mental institution. If I worried about the stained shirts, muddy pants, and overall appearance of them, we would never leave the house.

I have a rule of thumb for their appearance: as long as they are dressed appropriately for the weather and they don’t look homeless, we are good to go. Clothes are optional at home.

 I have learned not to worry so much about germs. Growing up in India, I don't remember my parents stopping me from eating mud or climbing trees, so why should it be any different for my kids? I want them to be kids, do silly things that make absolutely no sense for they have their entire life to be well behaved, well-adjusted adults conforming to societal expectations. Above all, I want their childhood to be filled with silly things so they have memories for tomorrow.

 So, the next time you ever see a mom of multiples, don't ask her how she does it. Instead tell her she's doing a great job. Next time you see a mom of multiple not really bothering about doing things you might never allow your kids to do, just remember she's constantly outnumbered and there is only so much she can do. 

 And here's my answer to a ton of funny questions I'm often asked: 

 Are they both twins? Yes of course, don't you get it twins=two babies!

 Are they natural/real? Yes, they are as real and natural as your Singleton kids. If you are actually curious about how they were conceived, I'm happy to meet you for a coffee date and give you every minute/detail of it! But just so you know, I never asked you or you never asked another singleton mama this question so why should this entice you?

Why are you so stuck up with schedules? Because two hungry/sleepy babies= crazy crying circus with one baby instigating the other in an endless cycle! 

Do you ever feel life would be different with just one baby? Of course, life would have been so much peaceful. Then again, I would’ve never known what it feels to kiss two babies in one go.

Do you have a favorite baby? Let me ask you something. Do you love your older child more than the younger one? I’d like to believe a parent can only offer endless love for any number of babies they have.

Am I going to have more kids? Let's get over this crazy journey to a more manageable age and you can ask me this question once again. 

I have heard people say that they are lucky to have to manage just one kid at a time. And when they look at me, they feel lucky they are not me. I’d like to leave them ignorant because they obviously have no idea about the adventures in my life or about the million good things my babies shove my way!

If you have twins or are expecting twins, remember not to sweat the small stuff. Wear a thick skin right from the start. Be prepared for a storm on a daily basis. Life will be chaotic most times but try not to miss the magical moments!

 

 

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